Deanna lay in the soft feather bed in the room she now claimed as her own in the small but homey cottage that Wish Star called home. She supposed now, she could call it ‘home’ as well. Two days had passed since she and Wish had finally set foot upon Eiler’s soil, and the devastation of the land had not gone unnoticed by either women, nor had the demeanor of the remaining populace. Aleris as a whole had seen so much turmoil in the past few years, and quite frankly, Deanna was amazed that those who still existed (for truly one could not call what these survivors did ‘living’), managed to continue about their day to day. People were resilient though. Somehow the cycle would continue. Life...death. All was inevitable.

Exhaustion had kicked her in the face, and other parts of her worn body, and Deanna had thanked her friend for the invitation, for the sanctuary, before showing herself to her room where she had remained with an apology to Wish for abandoning the fae, but the truth was, Deanna needed time to rest as she was sure Wish did, but also time to reflect.

Verial was alive. For that she was utterly grateful, and that knowledge comforted her even as she wept for the life that was no longer... Sahar. Deanna did not often cry, but she shed rivers of tears before lapsing into a necessary coma-like state of rest that her body demanded.

When she had finally awoken, nearly a day and a half later, Deanna had not budged from the bed, not even as she feigned sleep when Wish had gently knocked on the door and opened it slightly to peer inside the dark room. Deanna was touched that her friend cared for her well being, but she wasn’t quite ready to face the day, face the realities yet.

Instead she thought of Sahar. How unfair it was that the young magae would never see another sunrise. Would never pick another bouquet of blue roses that Deanna often found so thoughtfully placed in her room. Would never hear the sound of Sahar’s voice as she chastised (often) Verial and Deanna for their ‘extremely poor life choices”. It was all so unfair.

She thought of Verial and how he was coping with Sahar’s lost...and maybe hers as well. The dragonscale had been placed on the nightstand by the bed, as Deanna couldn’t bring herself to wear the token again. Her fingers grazed the small scar between her breasts, and from the moment the scale had flared to life and burned with a fiery brightness, Deanna had ceased to wear it, though she kept it hidden safely in her pocket along with the dragon pendant she had purchased in the shop in Chaliceton. These were the only prized possessions she had left in this world. Everything else was lost.

She thought of Rahne, the girl she had come to know as Brock Steelcod. Only upon return to Eiler did she discover the identity of the young teenager and the truth behind the girl’s words. She did indeed work for the Chronicle, which was now closed for an indefinite period of time. Rahne’s words had originally chilled Deanna for they were unexpected, but Deanna understood hate and most important...revenge. The girl would come for her one day, and it pained Deanna to know that when that day came, she would have to kill Rahne. There would be no reasoning with the girl who blamed Deanna for acts she was unable to control.
She thought of the boy king who had died, leaving Eiler leaderless amongst the chaos. How the people who needed a strong presence to guide them during their dark days were now fending for themselves, and how such an absence in rulership left the city vulnerable for the corrupt to take advantage of. She had heard rumors of how Elved was also without, how Lady Victoire was in Chaliceton as Bariston was nearly leveled again, if not for the resourcefulness of their captain who saved Bariston and its people at the expense of his own life. Heruin was no different as Wish had mentioned that the desert lands were without a Padishah, and that Sharay still lingered in the area. Deanna could not hide the horror she felt at the idea of the goddess ruling over the southern continent. Deanna knew it would only be a matter of time before the ambitious goddess would clutch at the surrounding lands.

Finally...Deanna thought of the child that steadfastly grew in her womb. The gestation period was beyond ridiculous, as Deanna couldn’t seem to recall a time she wasn’t pregnant. Her belly grew bigger with each passing month, and even now, the little monster was kicking up a storm. Deanna surmised that since the child had such an unusual pedigree, it took longer to ‘cook’ than a normal human child. Resentful of the babe that resided in her, Deanna couldn’t help but admire the strength of the child who managed to successfully thrive despite conditions that should have killed it ten times over. Sahar was right. Verial had super sperm and Deanna had an iron womb, but failed to predict the stubborness of Verial’s offspring. This baby would come into this world when it was good and ready and not a moment sooner, much to her chagrin.

Deanna bit her lip as she reminded herself that she and Wish needed to have a serious heart to heart. Deanna wasn’t so blind to the fact that she was hardly mother material, and whether she wanted the babe or not, it deserved the best possible upbringing in life, and who better to nurture and guide Verial’s child than Wish? Deanna figured that if the child grew up under the guidance of Aurora’s Paladin, then perhaps it would have a chance to reject whatever dark influences passed onto it via Sharay. That was Deanna’s greatest fear...she would birth a monstrosity that would bring about the utter obliteration of Aleris. Wish was the obvious solution, for the fae was a representation of goodness, of light, of love. What better choice to raise such a ‘special’ child than Wish?

Deanna did consider the fact that Wish would reject her request, but she was prepared with a counterattack that would leave Wish with little choice: either raise the baby, or Deanna would have no choice but to kill it. It wasn’t that she was so heartless and cruel to murder a baby in cold blood, but Deanna was realistic about such the situation. She took into consideration the babe’s father and biological mother, then added Sharay into the mix. The genetic combinations could prove devastating as the child would be born with an unclean slate. Wish simply had to acquiesce to her request. If not...Sharay would. Deanna didn’t even want to consider how the child would turn out under the influence and tutelage of the Goddess of Chaos and Death.

She rose ungainly to her feet and called out to Wish. When there was no reply, Deanna surmised that the fae had gone to the mainland for whatever supplies they needed or perhaps at Aurora's temple, and padded into the bathing area where she reveled in a hot bath. The cleansing was sorely needed, both physically and mentally though the smell of flowery scented bath oil brought momentary tears to her eyes as she was painfully reminded of Sahar….and Verial. The pang in her heart was great as she knew in her heart of hearts she could never return to Chaliceton, never return to Verial. Not after leaving him like that, not after giving his child away. How could she look him in the eyes after all she had done? What hurt even more was the fact that Verial would not want her back in his life even had she swallowed her pride and meekly returned to him. He would reject her, as she had seemingly callously rejected him. She couldn’t blame him. Still, it stung.

Wrapped in a towel, Deanna made her way over to Wish’s room where after a brief inventory of clothing she determined there wasn’t exactly much to choose from. Wish was petite and her clothing reflected it. Glaring at herself in the large mirror, Deanna scowled at the behemoth she had become and snatched a robe that she thought might fit her. It did. Barely.

Annoyed, she stormed (more like angrily waddled) downstairs into the main living area where she raided Wish’s pantry. There wasn’t much, as the fae likely had not been home in a while, but what was there and edible...Deanna ate with great gusto. After stuffing the last cracker into her mouth, she blinked at the vast amounts of food she had managed to shovel into her mouth in such a short period of time and finally shrugged, chalking it up to the baby. Kid needed to eat, right?

Wish had still not returned, so Deanna cleaned up her mess and decided a walk along the shoreline was in order. The sand was a soft and powdery white, the water a clear and warm turquoise blue. Deanna totally understood while Wish chose to live on this island in solitude, and wondered about her own fate after the baby was born. Where would she go? What would she do? Wish’s cottage was only temporary residence, at least until the baby was born...whenever that might be. She couldn’t stick around for much longer after that. Plans had to be made, for despite the fact that Deanna was basically dumping a baby off on the fae, she wasn’t such a bitch that she wouldn’t provide for the child...and Wish. Children, from what she had seen in her life, were expensive. They required things like a wet nurse, or a goat or something, maybe burlap sacks to contain the foul matter that seemed to endlessly project from their backsides.

Deanna’s feet sunk into the sand as she walked and pondered. Exactly what did she own? She did have a couple of plots of land she had one day hoped to build upon, but of course that never happened. It was always something that prevented her from settling down somewhere, wasn’t it? Perhaps she could sell those and give the gold to Wish. Still, Deanna needed to do something with her life that had purpose...and income.

She was still actively racking her brain when she heard the voice. It was only (heh) thinking that the fae had returned, but Deanna had recognized the owner of the voice who had called her name and cringed. Shivers ran up and down Deanna’s spine as the unwanted and unexpected Sharay spoke again in that lovely sultry voice of hers, and without looking at the goddess, Deanna could swear she was smiling at Deanna’s displeasure.

“Hello darling. You look like you could use some guidance. Never fear, mother is here.”

Deanna sighed and looked down at the sand, hoping that someone, somewhere would take pity on her and the ground would swallow her whole. She shifted her feet and waited to sink into the sand. Nothing happened. Her feet were still firmly planted on the sand, her belly was still ginormously huge....and Sharay was still there.

Great.