Aleris

Often we don't write about the things our characters do that is well... "normal". Like brushing their teeth or taking care of the garden or sitting down to read a good book. Let's step away from all the adventures and epic storylines and write about something that doesn't involve magic, battles or tales of romance. It doesn't matter what your character is doing that's the norm; just write it!

Basic rules:

• Your post must be at least 500 words long.
• Your post can be set in Aleris' era of time, or you can make it as if your character exists in present day. (If your post is in present day, you should start the post in "Nowhere Land" or reply here with your entry.)
• Any posts submitted after 05.16.2012 will not be accepted. That gives us two weeks for this challenge.
• You may reply with your post to this thread, start it in any forum or attach it to another storyline. If your post is in another forum, please reply to this post with a link to it.

Full rules for Writing Challenges can be found here.

Submission dates for this have been updated. Please see original post.

My post is in Eiler forum under Of Foxes and Routine I don't no how to link it sorry.

viewtopic.php?f=121&t=935

Linked it for ya.

****Disclaimer: First-This absolutely did NOT happen in the realm wide storyline. Just something I figured would provide comic relief for Deanna. Second-Due to the nature of Deanna's personal feelings for children, I would just like to point out that I personally happen to like the little goobers, having two of my own, and ask that no one take what I write personally against children in general. Thanks!****


Deanna roamed the castle in search of Lani for more suitable attire. The borrowed dress and sandals the girl had provided to Deanna was nice, more than nice really, for Deanna hadn't owned any particular clothing items so fine in quite a long while. However, finery didn't equal practicality, and Deanna was nothing but practical. Actually, if she was honest with herself, she wasn't too keen on the idea of fighting in such garb should the need arise, finding it would be a hindrance.

She found herself lost actually in this maze that Alerion called a castle, and it was only sheer chance that she heard a female voice emanating from a nearby room. It sounded like the servant girl, so Deanna headed over to the opened doorway and poked her head in. In retrospect, she probably should have said screw the clothes and just walked on.

Without warning, a hand shot out and grabbed her by the arm, yanking her within the room Said hand belonged to the woman whose voice she had mistakenly believed belonged to Lani. The woman looked frazzled and wide-eyed, her hair sticking up on all ends, her clothes askew. It was still morning, and she appeared to have crawled out of a gutter, yet despite her bedraggled appearance, this strange woman actually appeared grateful for Deanna's presence.

"Oh thank the gods you're finally here! I was beginning to think you wouldn't show!" The sound of desperation in the woman's voice that she hadn't bothered to conceal filled Deanna with sudden dread.

"Um, yeah sure, crazy lady. Listen, I'm in the wrong place, I'm actually looking for-"

Deanna cut herself off when she finally noticed the reason behind the woman's desperation and appearance. Twenty children, ranging in ages of perhaps three to ten ran like wild maniacs into the room, screaming at the top of their lungs. Where they had come from, Deanna couldn't begin to say, but here they were, hungry little monsters just waiting to get their sticky claws on the shifter.

They were coming right at her.

"Holy shit!" Deanna jumped out of the doorway and prepared to flee from the mob of evil gnomes, but the woman once more grabbed her arm and yanked her inside the tomb of evil. "No! You can't leave me here now! You just got here! We're supposed to take care of them until after lunch! That's when their parents return from their meetings!" Like a rabid monkey, the woman, who would eventually introduce herself as Sharon, had a death grip on Deanna, despite the shifters attempts to pry the caregiver off her person.

"What? Wait, you think I'm here to watch these things?! Are you insane? I just took a wrong turn! Hey! Stop that! Let me...damn, you're stronger than you look..." Deanna's protests didn't do any good, and Sharon managed to yank, pull and pry Deanna into the room where the children stared at her with their creepy bug eyed fascination.

Wiping sweat and hair from her face, Sharon smiled brightly at the little heathens. "Children, this is Miss..." The woman shot Deanna a look, prompting her to reluctantly release her name. "Err...Deanna," she managed through gritted teeth. "And I'm not staying. I don't do children.' With that, the shifter spun on one heel, only to shriek as somehow, one of the little visions of terror managed to sneak up behind her, blocking her ext.

"Now children, while your parents are busy figuring out a plan regarding our situation here in the palace, Miss DeDe and I will be taking care of you! We'll have lots of fun! Won't that be wonderful?" Sharon beamed a sunny smile at the children and a scowling Deanna.

"Look here, psycho. First, my name isn't DeDe, Ok? That's just stupid. Second, I'm seriously not a lover of kids. I have NO idea how to take care of them, and frankly, looking at you right now, and you're kinda scary looking, I don't want to." Sharon obviously hadn't heard a thing Deanna said, or was pointedly ignoring her, whichever the case was. Instead she nudged the shifter on over to what she called 'A Magical Story Rug' and indicated for her to sit down.

Sharon plucked ten of the monsters from the group and showed them how to sit in a circle surrounding Deanna, which was frightening it its own right, and leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Listen, Miss DeDe, I don't care who you are. I was supposed to have some help here, and she didn't show. So you're it. These are the children of Eiler's wealth. Politicians, nobles, those loyal to the King. It's our job to watch them while they are in their meeting. Please, for the love of all that is holy, it's only for a couple of hours. Just help me watch them, keep them entertained and then you're free to go. I swear."

Deanna glared at Sharon The Insane Freak, and stabbed a finger in her direction. "Fine. FINE! You have two hours. TWO! Then I don't give a shit who shows up or not, I'm outta here, y'got that?" Sharon bobbed her head up and down like a loon, then admonished Deanna of her language, to which Deanna was considering some other colorful phrase, but refrained.

"Okeedokey kids! Miss DeDe here is going to sing you songs and tell you stories while I take the other group for some outside fun! Enjoy!" And with that, Sharon and her brood of evil was out the door. Which left Deanna....and ten staring, fidgety children waiting for her to entertain them.

"Uh," She blinked, wondering what exactly she was supposed to sing to them. "Do you guys know the song about Sandpaper Sally?" The children shook their heads in unison, which made Deanna smile. "Well then, let's begin, shall we?" Deanna stood and began to sing about a young lass named Sally who had some unfortunate disease 'down there', which caused all the men to cry their woes. Quite possibly the children were looking for something more in tune to bunnies and rainbows, but Deanna went with what she knew. By the third round of 'Sandpaper Sally', the little wonders knew the entire lyrics, and also learned some new colorful words to add to their vocabulary.

"Miss DeDe, what's a whore?" "Yeah, what's a whore? And what's 'diseased poon'?" Deanna considered the children and pondered whether or not they should have been privy to such information. "Well, kiddos, ask your parents when you see them. Tell them Miss Sharon taught you, ok?"

Next they wanted a story, actually they demanded one until Deanna threatened to hang them by their earlobes outside the window. "Shut up now! Gods! Your voices are like glass breaking. Sit down and I'll tell you a story." Quietly the children sat with their hands in their laps, and one little three year old scrub actually had the audacity to try to climb in Deanna's lap. "Uh, yeah...no." Deanna plucked the child up and dumped her unceremoniously on the ground next to another kid who was wiping his nose on the back of his hand. "That's disgusting! Go wipe your nose!" The boy leaned over and used the pigtails of another little girl his age to clean his nose filth. "Um, yeah, that works, I guess. Ok brats, story time!"


Deanna didn't know of any children stories, and all were asking for some tale about dragons, fair maidens and brave knights. Deanna considered their requests for a moment, then inspiration struck. "I know the perfect tale!" So she began to recount the events of Tezzra's Gorge, which was suitable considering it had dragons (Verial and Kyrian), brave knights (Quinn), and fair maidens (Uh...hello? Duh!), and even better, evil wicked monsters!

By the time Deanna was finished with her tale in all of its gory detail, the children were shaking, crying, pale faced, and one little boy had wet himself. The shifter stood and shook her head at them. "Seriously? You guys are a sad bunch. It was a story! Did a werewolf try to eat YOUR arms off? No. Are you guys burning like crispy critters? No. Get over yourselves."

Rolling her eyes, Deanna surmised that about an hour had gone by without a sign of Sharon and her vile children. She was considering making a break for it when one tiny tot, a little girl with her missing front teeth tugged on the skirt of her dress. Deanna glanced down and tugged the material of her dress from the child's offensive grip. "Don't touch me. See your hands? They're filthy. I don't want that sticky crap on my clothes. Now what do you want?" The wee girl smiled brightly at Deanna and informed her she had to go potty. Deanna was unimpressed. "So go." The child had this strange screwed up look on her face and began hopping around wildly, informing Deanna once more that she had to use the privy.

"Again, I say, go! Go! You have to pee? Go to the privy!" Deanna shooed her in the direction of the doorway and gave her instructions on where the bathroom was located. "Go on now. Good luck! Hopefully you'll find your way back!" With a cheery smile, she sent the little gal off, and turned back to the other children. Deanna figured the child was around four and possibly not quite stupid enough to get lost or in some sort of trouble.

"So. Let's play another game. It's called the sleeping game. You guys lay down on the Magic Rug or whatever it's called and take a nap. The one who naps the longest...uh.....will...." Deanna tapped her foot, trying to come up with a suitable reward. "You know what, forget it. Just lay your asses down and go to bed. I have a headache." Honestly, Deanna couldn't care less if they slept or not, as long as they left her alone. She sat in a chair and hunched over with her head in her hands.

Not five seconds went by before she heard the arguing and crying from two children who were in some sort of scuffle. Cursing and sighing, the shifter rose from her chair and marched over to where a boy and girl were pushing and shoving each other. "What the hell are you two doing? What's the problem here?" The two, who were the eldest of the group, began babbling about how one called the other a name, and the other retaliated by shoving. It was a story that Deanna could have cared less about, and their whining was getting on her nerves, so she slapped both of them upside their heads, called them morons, and sent them in a corner to stay until hell froze over.

"And if either of you move, I swear I'll tie you up with your own clothes and lock you in a closet!"

Finally earning some peace and quiet, for the remainder of the children were playing a quiet game of tag (who knew what happened to the little girl for she never returned), Deanna settled once more in her chair and closed her eyes.

The shifter must have fallen asleep for the next thing she knew, a manic Sharon was shaking her awake and screaming in her face that the children were gone. Deanna yawned and sleepily rubbed her eyes before glancing around the room. Sure enough, the only two remaining were the ones Deanna left in the corner. The rest, well....

"Uh. Maybe they went on a field trip?" She smiled at Sharon, whom Deanna swore was about to have a stroke. "In any case, I'm out of here. I'm hungry, I'm tired, and frankly, I've had enough of this foolishness." She made her way to the door when Sharon raced in front of her, blocking her way.

"You can't leave!" The woman screeched to Deanna. "You have to find the children!"

Deanna was slowly becoming annoyed here. "No, I don't. You're the caretaker here, not me. You find them." With that, Deanna grabbed Sharon's face and shoved her backwards, so that the woman stumbled and fell on her ass.

"Good luck with all that! Hopefully they weren't sold into slavery or died!"

Whistling to herself, Deanna left Sharon there, a broken mess of a woman, and headed toward the main dining area. She considered the past two hours of her life, which was hell, and considered the idea of becoming a mother. She shuddered and nixed that idea rather quickly.

She ran into Quinn just as she turned a corner, and with an evil glint in her eyes, asked her mate:

"Ever consider a vasectomy?"

Thank you Dystopia

Poll is up! Please vote. Thanks to those who joined!

Congrats, Deanna and Madrin! You have both won this challenge. Your prizes are 250 exp, 100 gold, and choice of any +2 (or lower) weapon or armor from the Executioner's Block.

Your character sheets will be updated with the experience and gold. Please let me know what armor or weapon you would like.

Thank you for the consideration I would like +2 chainmail for my prize. Also, well done Deanna I was wondering how a tie worked. I'm glad we were viewed as equals in this challenge it was a pleasant surprise.